11 steps to self-care after job loss
After job loss can be a turbulent time and it's easy to neglect yourself. Now more than ever, self-care is needed. Follow these 11 steps to rebuild your life.
You’ve just suffered a major blow if you’ve lost your job. You’re not overreacting. Job loss ranks in the top 10 stressors on the Holmes and Rahe scale.
You’ve lost not only your paycheck, but also your work family, your routine and identitiy. You may be attacked with thoughts of low self-esteem and condemnation. Likely, you’re experiences one of the stages of grief outlined by Elisabeth Kubler Ross. Grief can be hard on your body, so it’s important to take care of yourself.
Follow these steps to move you toward healing and hope.
- Maintain a good sleep schedule. Sleep is fundamental to your ability to function. It’s tempting to stay up late and sleep in because you’ve lost your routine. But now, more than ever, you need stability. Keep a good sleep schedule. Aim for eight hours of sleep and follow good sleep hygiene. Your body and brain will thank you later.
- Walk. You don’t have to go to the gym. A simple walk outdoors is good for the body and soul. Breathe in the air. Look at the sky. Soak in nature’s colors. Let your walk be a restorative time. If you want, you can sing or talk as you walk. If you prefer to exercise in another form, pick your favorite. Swim, golf, play tennis. Whatever you like. Exercise will help you release the much-needed endorphins to enhance your mental health.
- Call a friend. Yes, just like the TV game show “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire,” a friend can be your lifeline. After job loss, you can lose your sense of belonging without work and work family. Stay connected with a friend whom you can trust to share your heart.
- Eat right. OK. You can spend a week or so eating comfort foods and chocolate, but then you need to nourish your body with nutritious food. You’ve been through a trauma. Your body needs you to fuel it with some fruits, vegetables and protein.
- Pray or meditate. If you believe in God, then pour hour heart out to Him in prayer. Don’t hold back. Release your cares and your concerns, your worries and fears. If you seek your spiritual strength on a different path, you may want to meditate.
- Give thanks. You may feel there is nothing to be thankful for, that your life has been upended. You’re right. You’re going through one of life’s toughest trials. That’s why it is important to focus on gratitude. Researchers at the University of California-Davis discovered that intentional gratitude is good for your physical and mental health because it reduces stress. Give thanks for what you have. A caring spouse or partner. A place to live. Food to eat. Family and friends who love you. Anything you can give thanks for. And if you believe in God, direct that gratitude toward Him.
- Cry. Many view tears as a sign of weakness. I see them as a tool for healing and cleansing. Let that pain come out. If it’s stuck inside you, it only wreaks havoc on your mind and body. Set the timer. Schedule a cry. Grab your tissues and let the tears come. You can schedule a cry as often as you need one. Healing is a process lli8ke peeling an onion one layer at a time.
- Find a Bible verse/battle cry. For me, I clung to Jeremiah 29:11 NLT: “For I know the plans I have for you says the LORD. They are plans for good and not evil, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. You will find me when you seek me with all your heart.” When I felt overwhelmed, I would remind myself that while what was happening at that moment may not feel good or full of hope, that God’s plan is to bring me a future and a hope. You can find a battle cry that fits you. If you like music, you could consider Gloria Gaynor’s classic, “I Will Survive.”
- Journal. Start writing about your job loss, so emotions don’t get stuck in you. You’ve been through a trauma. Journaling is good for your physical health, mental health and spiritual health. If you can’t sleep at night, grab your pen and journal. Writing may help to empty your mind of the thoughts disturbing you.
- Groom. Shower. Put on your makeup. Get your hair cut. You are worthy. Don’t slide into “letting yourself go.” If you’re concerned about your budget, go to a beauty school for your haircut. You’ve suffered a wounding, so it’s important to put your best self forward. You are worthy of looking your best. Plus you never know who you might meet when you’re out getting groceries or walking.
- Get some help. If you are able, a counselor or life coach might be a good investment even though you’ve just suffered an income loss. If you’re on COBRA, you may qualify for EAP counseling. Some university counseling departments offer free counseling for students to gain practice.
Job loss is a traumatic event. So it’s important to be gentle with yourself and to exercise self-care. This list is by no means exhaustive, but it can get you on track to finding hope.
You can do this! I believe in you.
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